But this is what you must do: Tell the truth to each other (Zechariah 8:16).

If you really loved me, you’d know what I was feeling.” “If I have to tell you what I’m thinking, I won’t do it.”

Have you ever said things like that to each other? It’s not uncommon for hurting spouses to expect their mates to know exactly what they’re feeling and why. It’s also very unrealistic. The truth is we can’t read each other’s minds. (Would you really want anyone to have complete access to your mental data files?)

The apostle Paul offers a wonderful alternative to the impossible task of reading minds: speaking the truth in love. He tells us to “put away all falsehood and ‘tell your neighbor the truth.’”

When we’re upset with our wife we should quit expecting our spouse to read our mind. Instead, we should say something like, “Dear, when you walked ahead of me through the mall, I felt unimportant to you.” Or, “when you criticized how I painted the eves, I felt unappreciated.” That will end the guessing game and let the reconciliation begin in your marriage. So what’s on your mind today?

—Bob Moeller
www.forkeepsconference.com

Adapted from: Marriage Minutes (Moody Press)